The Process Never Ends
To the process –
In may ways, it feels like a cycle has come to an end recently. The process is “over.
For the last few years, I’ve struggled with feeling confident in myself and my capabilities. Entering college hit that point in various ways, from what I was doing with my free time to the plans I had for the future. But, like every challenge that arises, I slowly worked to overcome it.
At the start, I tried to remember how it took time to settle in to high school and how it took time to find my place in each community. I knew things took time, there was a process to it all, but it still couldn’t bring back my confidence. I really thought, this time it’s not going to work.
And of course, the process worked. It was hard and with time, I became more and more sure of what I liked and wanted in my life. I gained back my confidence and then some, in ways that I could have only found by losing it in the first place. The only thing I had left to conquer was my worry around my career. I felt like I wasn’t on track with my peers and once again, thought, things aren’t going to work out this time.
Last month, I got a great internship. I hit the benchmark I set for myself and quieted those concerns. There was nothing left to work through in the process and no stress left in my days. But… quickly I realized that wasn’t the case.
In reality, I have so much more to grow. Issues I had previously sidelined now cameo to light – this phase of confidence was only one part. I wholeheartedly believe that things work out in the end and I hadn’t reached the end just yet.
I am proud of my progress and the work I put in each step of the way. I also have to acknowledge that more change is ahead, and I need to be there to greet it.
xo Iris
