A season of discovery & blooming flowers
For the first time in my life, I’ve been able to slow down. We live in a society that never seems to pause and where we’re made to feel like you constantly have to be doing something. With a global pandemic upon us, the world had no choice but to slow down. As the city began to shut down all around me and we shifted to remote learning and working, I realized how stressed I was and that I’d been carrying that stress for a while. For the first time in a long time, I had a chance to think, see, and feel.
“The way I see things, there’s always room for improvement. ”
What kind of life do you want to live?
I asked myself this question and had the chance to sit down with my thoughts. What kind of people do you want to be surrounded by? What do you want to learn? What kind of career do you seek? For the first time, I got to think of what I want out of life and be more mindful.
I looked at myself in the mirror and I thought about the things I love about myself and the things I want to improve. The way I see things, there’s always room for improvement. I want to be more creative, I want to live a healthier life, I want to strengthen the relationships I already have, and, most importantly, I want to learn.
I always remember a prayer one of my teachers used to recite—the Serenity Prayer.
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; the courage to change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference.”
A lot of times we focus on the what ifs and what could’ve been. I started focusing on the present, the things you can control, and the things you can change. Being positive is easier said than done but seeing the positive pieces of my life helped me appreciate life a bit more. Despite facing some setbacks and challenges on the way, this period of growth has been eye-opening for me because I was finally able to focus on the things I need to live the life I want.
As I began to be more mindful of my lifestyle, I started to fill my life with the things I care about and are important to me.
I’m the kind of person who likes to dabble. There were always things I wanted to do or try but didn’t have the chance to. With more time on my hands, I was finally able to do the things I loved like reading poetry, DIY skincare routines, and writing. I was given the opportunity to be creative and creativity is so important in the times I’m living in. It’s a way that I can express myself and put my ideas out into the world.
“ I’m like a flower that’s been bathing in the sun, with just the right amount of water and love. I feel like I’m at the point in my life where I’m finally beginning to bloom.”
Friendship, for example, became something that was important to me. I took the time to analyze my relationships with people and realized that there were some that I had outgrown. My definition of friendship was completely different, I realized, and there’s nothing wrong with that. We’re quick to point the finger and find someone to blame, but, in this case, I realized that it was a me problem. I held myself accountable and cut out people that couldn’t give me the kind of friendship I wanted.
To reach my goals, I realized that I was going to have to start stepping out of my comfort zone.
Learning is important to me and, during this time, I’ve learned so much. I’ve improved my writing skills by doing writing exercises and journaling. I managed to build and design my own personal website, improving my online presence. And I got my first freelance gig as a social media manager. These were things I hadn’t thought of before and probably wouldn’t have if life hadn’t slowed down for me. Doing all of this required me to step out of my comfort zone. Instead of brushing it off or convincing myself that I’m not skilled enough, I just went full speed ahead and just did it. The fear of failure is what has held me back in my personal endeavors and believe that when you finally push yourself, you set yourself up for success!
There’s so much I’ve learned about myself. I’ve discovered the things I need from life and what will make me happy. Thinking of seasons of life and where I am on that spectrum, I found myself thinking of flowers. I’m like a flower that’s been bathing in the sun, with just the right amount of water and love. I feel like I’m at the point in my life where I’m finally beginning to bloom.
Ahdaci Barrett is a social media marketer, writer, and design enthusiast based in New York City. She's currently studying advertising and marketing communications at Fashion Institute of Technology after deciding to shift her career to a more creative direction. When she's not working or in school, she enjoys cooking, traveling, reading, and writing. She strongly believes in following your passions and turning them into a career. You can find her on LinkedIn and on her portfolio website.
