On Saying Yes

When I think about how I started off my career or how I built my creative ventures, it’s a lot of saying “Yes!”

Thankfully we live in a culture of “yes”, so we have a lot of opportunities to say the word. However, everytime we say “yes,” we’re saying “no” to something else. It’s a constant trade off: yes to friends means no to self care. Yes to an extra shift means no to getting the sleep your body needs.

Since we can’t haphazardly say “yes,” how do you decide what's worth your time? I think there is no one-size-fits-all answer for this. In my opinion, it depends on factors like:

Is this something related to a goal I’m working toward?
What do I have to say no to, if I say yes?
How many other things are going on that week that could make me feel overwhelmed?
Do I have other deadlines that I have to meet?
Is this something I’m going to have fun doing?
Where is it located and how much time is it going to take for me to get there?
If I say yes, am I being compensated well enough?

After I run through my checklist, I make my decision.

If it’s a yes, then we party! We celebrate and have some fun. If it is a no, then we party for knowing our worth, our goals, and focus. Either of these choices can fill us with joy if we let them!

I’ve personally struggled with saying yes on many occasions. It’s been fairly common for me to have obligations for things I’ve said yes to every night of the week for 3 weeks in a row. However, I can promise you that saying yes to everything is basically the same thing as booking a one-way flight to burnout town.

I’ve learned that the best way to prevent burnout is to have boundaries. The thing is, boundaries are just to keep things out. They protect you from going too far. I’ve learned that boundaries are an asset, because the more I honor my boundaries the better I can show up at work, with my clients, and with my friends and family.

“When you’re trying to grow, it’s important to be present and attentive to the people you’re around. You simply can’t do that when you’re doing a million other things at the same time.”

I’m sure we all know that person who is always busy. They are running from one thing to the next and never stopping to take a breather. These humans aren’t great to work with because you can never get time with them and it feels impossible to be on the same page because they are on 700 pages themselves! When you’re trying to grow, it’s important to be present and attentive to the people you’re around. You simply can’t do that when you’re doing a million other things at the same time.

When we learn the spectrum/balance that allows us to be our best selves, it is important to attempt to reach that level of balance when possible. I’m the queen of “life happens”, but imagine coming out of a weekend refreshed, restored, and replenished – ready to take on a new week. I like to think of it like the seasons: we see the most beautiful trees in the spring, when they are rested and coming back to life and in the fall, when they are about to go into a season of rest. For me, it’s a good indicator that after this season of “yes,” I need a season of “no” to regroup, readjust, and refocus so I can come back ready to grow and thrive with a new energy.

My journey of saying “yes” and “no” has come in seasons. I wish I could say I have it down but in reality, I usually say “yes” to a lot of things, then say “no” to a lot of things, then say “yes” to a lot more things. I’m still trying to find the balance.

As a young professional, it’s important to remember that there will always be more opportunities. We aren’t shutting ourselves out of experiences, partnerships, or future success when we say no. We’re protecting our balance, we’re favoring the things that matter, and we’re making a choice that will put us at ease in the weeks to come.

Randalyn Hill is one of our monthly contributors. After blogging for a combined total of over 200 days she started a creative newsletter in January of 2019. During that time, she started freelancing as a photographer and a content writer. Not long after she started full time at Ama La Vida she quickly realized she would get an opportunity to leave a creative imprint there as well through their social media and the company blog. Her current focuses outside of work are growing the creative community in Chicago and finding the best gluten free pizza around.